I think… therefore I am.

Maybe the expression should be… I think therefore I “think” I am.

I “think” too much.  I understand I should use my brain to think about how to drive a car.  And how to use an I-phone.  And how to change the ink in my printer.

But the truth is, that’s not what I spend the majority of my time and energy “thinking” about.  I spend way more time thinking… I wonder what my mother meant by the comment she made?  I wonder if my husband is going to speak to me in that tone of voice again that feels like fingernails on the chalkboard inside my head?  I wonder if he would hit me back if I slapped him right across the cheek the next time he did it?  Is my daughter going to find what she is looking for on her up-coming world travels?  Thinking of trips, should I go on a trip?  When was my last vacation?  My brother is away on vacation, why aren’t I?  Who would I want to go with?  Is there something wrong with me that I want to go on vacation by myself?

Maybe the expression should be… I think therefore I am NOT.

The only thing I can be when I’m thinking is… thinking!  And thinking isn’t being present.

Maybe I should rely on the five senses to be present. I see/taste/smell/hear/touch… therefore I am.

Most importantly…

I stop thinking… therefore I am.